We spent about 120 nights camping across the US so far and we have seen a lot of people camping next to us. Here are 10 types we see regularly, to the point we can stereotype them. Not to be taken seriously…
1. The Millionaire RV guy
He’s traveling cross-country with about a million dollar of useless gear: a huge RV, 3 TVs, a golf car, etc. He’s usually getting in a huge argument with his wife when having to park the thing anywhere as it nearly takes him one hour.
2. The Professional #vanlife hipster
He/She/They purchased an extremely beautiful and outrageously expensive Volkswagen Wanagon . They now spend hours and hours taking pictures of it and themselves in unbelievable situations for Instagram (running on an empty road net to their van, fashionably dressed, with the van door opening on the view of a monument you can’t camp next to, etc.). Then, they get millions of followers and make money through sponsorship, so that they can spend even more days finding the perfect pose and hashtags for Instagram.
3. The Creepy Dude
A male in his forties, he’s camping in his car right next to you in the middle of the week, making fire for himself, drinking beer and watching you from time to time. And he’s not a fisherman or some outdoorsy person. And there’s no one else in the campground. To sleep ok we have to assume he got into an argument with his partner and just needs a place to crash.
4. The Motorcycle guy
You think you’re frugal, and then you see him coming at 11pm, setting up the tiniest military tent in the world or a hammock, heating a can of beans on the fire. At 6 am, he’s gone.
5. The Big Family
They booked 3 campsites next to each other 2 years in advance and it just looks like they are barbecuing for 48 hours straight. They usually bring their own barbecue gear.
6. The Bonfire guy
He bought $100 dollars worth of wood, then he uses a fire starter and contributes more to global warming in one night than yourself in a year.
7. The Katy Perry guy
He’s going “camping” only to blast very loud music, usually Katy Perry or some nineties pop you no longer want to hear (The Cranberries…). It’s always a shitty song you hate and that will stick in your head for a week.
8. The Camp Host
He lives in the campground 6 months a year and you will never seen him if you need him, but he’s going to throw you out of the bathroom for cleaning purposes at the worst possible time for doing so (between 8 and 10am).
9. The Dog owners
They have at least 2 large dogs and they write bad reviews of campsites who have a no-dog policy without having visited them. Since dogs are allowed pretty much nowhere public, they spend entire days walking their dogs around the campground.
10. The Stingy & judgmental European couple
They would scavenge wood in a place that has almost none for a couple hours just to save $5 bucks not buying a bundle. They don’t care about no showers if there is wifi or LTE on their campsite. They write this kind of post.
Do you camp full time in the US? Help me complete this list!
Hah! OK seriously why do campgrounds clean the bathrooms right when everyone wants to use them?!
The bonfire and guitar people, the kids who ride their bikes around the loop non-stop, the old people who don’t realize they’re talking so loud (so how can you be mad?), the cheap Wal-mart cabin tent people (who leave when the first storm comes), The people who sit in their site all day long, the ladies who bring a blow dryer and full make-up to the bathroom, the people who don’t know to keep their food away from the critters at night, the light up palm tree people…
Agree with 100% of these and have witnessed all of them!!
The bring-every-riding-toy-the kids-own people; the hanging-up-crafty-wooden-signs people (“Happy Campers Harry and Darlene”); the almost-get-divorced-every-time-we-work-together-to-back-in- people; the let’s-go-camping-in-the-woods-and-have-a-blowout-domestic-fight people; the family-with-the-toddler-that-cries-all-night people…